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Hello! It’s Kristine here with the Express to Impress podcast, and today I’ll be talking about making a strong first impression on someone you meet. You’ve probably already heard that people form an impression of who you are in just a matter of seconds. Humans use verbal and nonverbal communication cues to judge whether a person is confident, intelligent, trustworthy, approachable, good-humored, serious, and more. We also perceive when others share our values and social status by observing their clothing, accessories, punctuality, mannerisms, and how they speak. All of this happens pretty much immediately as we meet someone. So, when we want to make a strong first impression on someone, it can feel daunting to get it right the first time, especially for introverts or people speaking a second language.
We all know that first impressions can be misleading, and studies consistently reveal people’s hidden biases and stereotypes about race, gender, and more, which influence perceptions. So, you will benefit from the opportunity to have many encounters with someone. There are several things you can do to ensure you make a strong first impression, which will open the door to opportunities to make a second, third, and fourth impression. Your verbal and nonverbal communication that will ensure you’re making a strong impression.
Story
There are many times it’s essential to make a strong first impression, like when you’re networking to get a new job. Deciding you will change jobs can be an exciting time. It was for me. I had worked as a full-time employee for the same company for about seven years when I envisioned a new path forward. I had just finished writing a lengthy master’s thesis while working full-time. I discovered how much I loved writing, but was sick-and-tired of cramming it into small windows before and after work and on the weekends. My ideal workweek would be working for an employer and researching, writing, and working on creative topics that interested me. So, I decided to pursue a part-time job as an independent contractor. It would mean saying goodbye to benefits and my salary, but I found the idea of freedom over more of my time irresistible.
So, I set out to learn about possible new jobs by turning to my network. I was serving on the board of directors of a youth leadership training organization and thought about my fellow board members. One woman came to mind–she was a talent development professional for the Executive Education and Executive MBA departments of a local business school. We had served on a committee together, so she had seen me in action. Ahh, perfect! So, I told her I was exploring quality part-time job opportunities and asked her if there were any needs at her organization. She graciously set up a lunch meeting with the school’s Executive Director and me.
While it was an exploratory meeting, I knew that it was important to make a strong first impression on the executive director. So, I began to prepare for the meeting. I explored the company’s website and social media online, taking notes, and writing down questions. I found the Executive Director on LinkedIn and carefully studied her career path and accomplishments, finding possible topics I could bring up or compliment her on during our meeting. I researched the pay rate ranges for independent contractors. I thought they would be most interested in my project management and event coordination experiences, so I scanned my annual reviews, looking for related quantifiable accomplishments that I could bring up during our meeting. I picked out a professional outfit for our meeting and printed a copy of my resume. I also researched how to behave and communicate effectively for a networking and interview opportunity. It was finally time for our lunch meeting, and I could not have been more excited. I dressed professionally, paid extra attention to my grooming, and arrived feeling happy to be in the spotlight. I smiled generously, maintained eye contact, and held good posture.
Over lunch, the women asked about my motivation for changing jobs, and that part was easy for me to articulate enthusiastically. We also talked about my social media, reporting, and intern supervision experience, which overlapped with their needs. I talked with pride about my contributions and opportunities at my organization and asked about their plans and goals for their programs. As for the food on my plate, I didn’t finish it! This is a strange detail, and it’s rare for me, but I did it intentionally so that they knew they had my undivided attention.
Meanwhile, the executive director made a strong impression on me. Aside from her impressive credentials, she was warm, poised, funny, and incredibly sharp, which put me at ease. Plus, she talked about her leadership style. When she hired someone, she believed in them and invested in them, and she would coach them to develop their skills further. I wanted to work for her and learn from her. At the end of the meeting, we shook hands, smiled warmly, and promised to be in touch.
I left convinced I had made a strong first impression. It was such a great feeling! While I made my first in-person impression on the executive director that day, in reality, I had already made two impressions on her. First, she already knew about me through word of mouth from our mutual contact. Second, she’d likely done her own research online and at least skimmed my LinkedIn profile. And following our meeting, I had a chance to make my fourth impression through my follow-up written communication. While I wanted to write an email immediately, I didn’t want to write the email during working hours, because that time belonged to my current employer at the time, and I anticipated the executive director would notice a detail like that. So, I waited until 5:30 pm to send the following email (I have changed names for confidentiality.):
Dear Rebecca and Andrea,
Thank you for meeting with me today and for lunch. I really enjoyed speaking with you, and (while it probably goes without saying), I’m very excited about the opportunity to work with you to administer the many thriving programs you manage at the Executive Education Center.
I will be in touch soon to follow up from our conversation.
Best wishes,
Kristine
Then, the next day, I sent the Executive Director a request to connect on LinkedIn with a personalized note. One week later, I sent another email with my availability and desired pay rate. I continued to move the conversation forward with proactive emails, and soon I was invited to meet and interview with two employees. Then, just shy of 8 weeks from our initial lunch meeting, I was hired and began training.
It turned out that I had made such a strong impression on the executive director, that when I started working, it felt like she believed I could do just about anything. She gave me challenging projects I didn’t think I was ready for, but I was, with her gentle coaching along the way.
Tips
So that’s my experience going about making a strong first impression, and it really paid off for me, so it’s something that I want to share with you so you can do it as well. Now, let’s look at some things you can do to make a strong first impression.
Preparing to Make a Strong First Impression
- Prepare to introduce yourself, your immediate goals, and how they fit in your career vision.
- Identify relevant and impressive quantifiable accomplishments to bring up during your meeting.
- Research the person and their employer. Read the person’s LinkedIn profile and other online profiles and review the company’s website and social media online.
- Research anything else that may come up during your meeting. For example, if you could discuss salary during your first meeting, research pay rate ranges for the position that interests you.
- Dress to impress! Choose attire that will make you feel confident and impress your audience, and attend to your personal grooming.
Making a Strong First Impression
- Communicate through your body language. Smile, maintain eye contact, hold good posture, nod, lean in, and raise your eyebrows when you’re impressed.
- Show enthusiasm while you speak. Examples could be: “I’m really passionate about…” or “I can’t wait to see…”
- Display confidence and pride in your work. While it may feel unnatural, don’t shy away from sharing your accomplishments or the opportunities you’ve been given and have before you. People are impressed by others who are in-demand.
- Give the person your undivided attention. That could mean leaving some food on your plate or not checking your phone.
- Bring up informed discussion topics, questions, and compliments based on your research to establish a strong connection. While your communication does not have to be perfect during your first encounter, it’s vital that you connect with the other person and find your common interests. If the person makes you feel at ease and tells a joke, go ahead and laugh!
- Reach out promptly after your meeting to reinforce your message and display strong writing skills. Be proactive and persistent in your follow up communication while also being patient. Long-lasting relationships require initiative on both parts and take time to build!
So, while there are things out of our control with a first impression, you now know about many things you can do to shape how you are perceived! How powerful is that!
If you want to learn more about how to introduce yourself while networking or interviewing and learn smart questions you can ask during informational interviews and job interviews, check out my online course, How to Land Your Next Job. It’s a five-hour course, and I provide one hour of video content about finding jobs, including Common Job Search Mistakes, Where to Look for Jobs Strategically, Preparing to Search for Jobs, Networking, Searching for Jobs, Applying for Jobs, and Finding Jobs. These lessons come with eight handouts to help you stay organized during your job search, and you can learn more and watch free previews of the course at www.express-to-impress.com.
Now, if you want to build your English vocabulary, continue listening to learn about the idioms and phrases I used in this episode.
Idioms & Phrases
Open the Door
Here’s how I used it: “There are several things you can do to ensure you make a strong first impression, which will open the door to opportunities to make a second, third, and fourth impression.”
It means to introduce or make something possible.
Sick-and-Tired
Here’s how I used it: “I discovered how much I loved writing, but was sick-and-tired of cramming it into small windows before or after work and on the weekends.”
It means to be thoroughly bored or annoyed with something.
Saying Goodbye to Something
Here’s how I used it: “It would mean saying goodbye to benefits and my salary, but I found the idea of freedom over more of my time irresistible.”
It means to lose or end something.
In Action
Here’s how I used it: “We had served on a committee together, so she had seen me in action.”
It means when someone or something is doing what they are good at what they are trained to do.
Be in the Spotlight
Here’s how I used it: “I dressed professionally, paid extra attention to my grooming, and arrived feeling happy to be in the spotlight.”
This means to be in the center of attention.
Word-of-Mouth
Here’s how I used it: “First, she already knew about me through word of mouth from our mutual contact.”
This refers to information that is passed orally from person to person, usually informally.
Just Shy Of
Here’s how I used it: “Then, just shy of 8 weeks from our initial lunch meeting, I was hired and began training.”
You can say something is just shy of an amount if it’s just short of that amount.
Shy Away
Here’s how I used it: “While it may feel unnatural, don’t shy away from sharing your accomplishments or the opportunities you’ve been given and have before you.”
This means to be unwilling to do something because you feel nervous, afraid, or not confident about it.
If you’re interested in learning more about human biases, I recommend an episode from one of my favorite podcasts, “Hidden Brain.” The title is “Radio Replay: The Mind Of The Village” and you can find a link in the show notes and transcript: https://www.npr.org/2018/03/09/591895426/the-mind-of-the-village-understanding-our-implicit-biases.
Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Express to Impress. I hope to see you next time. Bye!
Music By Lucas Knutter
